This year, I lived by the moon and with candle light. Every time I lit a candle, I imagined literally holding the light, handling it. I offered light for peaceful transitions, in meditations, during card readings, at ceremonies, in promise, and remembrance. I light candles to help set other things on fire: sage, paper, dried flowers, incense, a charcoal…
Rauhnächte is a practice of casting 13 wishes around the time of Yule. As I imagine walking through the practice of setting my wishes to flame, I think of how many other hands have held light over the centuries. I wonder how many are holding light these last few nights of 2025.
Many hands make light work. Do it.
Craft 13 wishes. Write each one on a small piece of paper and fold it, so you can’t see which wish is which. Put the folded wishes in a bowl, live with them. Look at the bundle of wishes, write about them…or dont.
Beginning on the Winter solstice, light a candle after sunset. Hold the light every night. For 12 nights, safely burn one wish each night – without reading it. On the thirteenth night, light the candle and unfold the remaining wish. Read it outloud by candle light. Place it where you will see it every day – next to your toothbrush, under your pillow, in your pocket…internalize it.
make it so.
I’ve spent a few days deciding how to construct my wishes. With a little help from friends and neighbors, I have decided wishes aren’t resolutions, or to do lists. They are general and self-resourced! They are sensed, when we get close to a manifesting a wish we can feel it. Wishes come from the heart and are deeply related to habitual behavior. I’m writing wishes that feel real and plausible. So far, I’ve got six solid wishes folded up, seven more to go.
Many hands make light work: another manifestation of Flaming Wishes..
Mom always says “Many hands make light work.” It was a way to encourage her children to collaborate in the mundane labor of cleaning: redding up, spring cleaning, laundry and dishes all went swiftly with six little hands at work! Over the years, I’ve leaned into the idea many times in my life. Yes, with doing dishes after a holiday meal, moving house, building an exhibit, or striking a stage.
A few years ago, I brought mom’s voice to life differently. My friend invited me as a plus one, to a holiday gathering. It was around Christmas time and the room was filled with creatives who cared deeply for each other. Once we were all gathered, our host asked everyone to create a short performance for the party. We were invited to pair up and take 15 minutes to devise some action or another, to engage or entertain.
My friend and I claimed the closet as a work space and stage. We put our heads and hearts together.
The walk-in closet was the size of a bedroom in a Manhattan walk up; it felt like our host, beautifully textured with their clothes, shoes and bags. The large space had two doors, it was a walk through, from the hallway to the bathroom, which also had two doors and led back to the hallway. We took only a few minutes to plot and rehearse our offering. We collected a box of tea light candles, some matches, and a chair.
Our instructions to the group were simple. Turn out all the lights at the party and come into the closet through the hall door, one at a time.
When a guest entered the closet, we greeted them by candlelight and handed them an unlit tealight. We invited them to sit on the chair, situated in the center of the closet. Once seated, we lit our guest’s candle and walked clockwise around the chair whispering ‘love’ in the guest’s ears. “love” “love” “love, love, love, love” Then, we asked our be-loved friend to exit through the bathroom door, return to the party and send in the next guest.
Our vision was that the darkened party would come to growing light as each person emerged from the closet with a candle. When the performance ended, I hugged my friend. We returned to the party and the room, our hearts calibrated through light.
Many hands make light work. Do it.
If you’ve read this far and think you will put your hands to work Flaming Wishes, I offer a personal note of caution: the wishes must be attainable, we must believe we can accomplish them. Otherwise, as my father said many times…”Wish in one hand and shit in the other. See which one fills up faster.” I’d always laugh and threaten to get his advise tattooed on my arm. Then he’d laugh. We laughed a lot.
He was right, in some way. We have to be careful what we wish for.
